IT’S ALL A PLOT!

Get vaccinated, wear a mask, wash your hands frequently and keep a safe distance.  It seems simple enough, but the REAL reason for the existence of COVID and its safety protocols is to stimulate conspiracy theories.

Obviously the virus was manufactured in China in a plot to achieve world domination.  It seems quite reasonable – they try it out on their own population first so that, if anyone survives, they know they haven’t quite got the formula right at this point.  But if everyone in China dies, then they know they’re on to a good thing…

Lockdowns are a plot to destroy the economy.  Workers will discover what billionaires have known all along – it’s way easier and more fun to get tax incentive money from the government than to toil in some crappy job.  After all, crappy jobs just make more money for… well – billionaires, of course.

What about governments printing endless streams of money?  It’s a plot to destabilize everyone’s currency so we’re forced back to bartering for goods and services.  We all want to return to the good old days – ‘I’ll trade you two chickens for that tooth extraction’ is far better than biting down on a bit-coin to find out if it’s real.  Never forget we’re still paying income tax to help pay for World War One.  

Mask wearing is mandated so that everyone wearing earrings will lose at least one while endlessly pulling the damned things on and off.  It’s a plot by the jewelry cartels that stand to make a fortune selling replacement earrings.

Vaccines?  Nothing but a plot aimed at keeping the planet overpopulated.  Devised by the drug companies and their billionaire owners, they will keep more people alive, thereby increasing the trillions in profits they make. We haven’t been fooled – especially when they’re now pushing booster shots. Yes, there will be no end to it all – more people living, more people, more boosters, more profits…

TL;DR

So much conspiracy – so little sense.

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