Election Kanadoodle – the Race Through Wonderland

It is an endless source of wonder that the media in Kanadoodle appears obsessed with having the voters elect either the Libelous or Consumptive Parties.  In the current race, the two parties are neck and neck with the only role envisioned for the other parties is the possibility that they could step on those necks and, depending on how they twist their foot, produce either a minority government or siphon off enough votes from one party to give a majority to the other party without having to go to the bother of getting even close to half the popular vote.   

We’re now at the stage where all the parties are getting a price tag put on their campaign promises.  The biggest difference between the Libelous and Consumptives in this department is that the Libelous Party says they’ll print wads of money and we’ll be in debt forever while the Consumptive Party says that they’ll print wads of money and economic growth under their tender loving care will magically pay off all the debts – with a little fairy dust left over to ice the cake.

A couple of questions:

If all these campaign promises were such a good idea, how come nobody made them happen long ago?

Could we convince the Bloc Quebecois to run candidates in all the provinces?

If Dustbin Truthless loses the election, will he be replaced by Tinker Bell?

If Erring O’Fool loses the election, will he be replaced by an oil derrick?

If the guy with the photogenic beard loses, will he be replaced by his mother?

If AnamemePee loses, will we all roast long before we get to hell?

TL;DR

Elections in Kanadoodle – so exciting.

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